The People I Slept With.

I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO BUT MOSTLY THANK THE GUYS MY FRIENDS AND I HAVE BEEN INVOLVED WITH BECAUSE ALL OF THE FOLLOWING STORIES ARE TRUE. Only names, dates and locations were changed to protect the fragile male ego.

Tag: relapse

DELETE ALL DRUNK SEXTS AND PRETEND THEY NEVER HAPPENED

by ThePeopleISleptWith

After a few drinks my casual conversation with hot acquaintance took a sharp turn. I promised myself I would never go back down that road so quick, but he had quite a way with words…. that is if you consider “I’ll make sure you cum,” a way with words. With every Pickleback shot I took I sent an increasingly suggestive text. I went to bed giddy but woke up full of regret. What my drunk brain perceived as charming in the light of day was quite the opposite. The angle of his dick pics were questionable. And the “You love my penis,” text was neither endearing nor true. I didn’t even know it. Thanks to me his head grew 3 sizes that day. I had no choice but to delete all the drunk sexts and pretend they never happened.

90 SECONDS OF TORTURE

by ThePeopleISleptWith

We broke up years ago but like clockwork every few months he would contact me, eventually I relapsed. I have this theory that as my ex he has some sixth sense that tells him when I am vulnerable. I didn’t give in quickly but after a while I agreed to go to his house for breakfast.. Given our ridiculous history I should have known what he meant by “breakfast.” I sat at his kitchen table as poured me a bowl of cereal… with no milk. Then he went upstairs to shower. As I sat on his bed playing Xbox hundreds of horrid memories resurfaced. He came back into his room with just a towel on… to be honest I was not surprised. He walked over to me and dropped his towel, dangling his penis in front of my face. Thus began one of my most horrifying sexual experiences. Maybe back when we dated I was just too young or unexperienced to notice that he was so selfish in bed. I felt like I was being attacked or punished. After the 90 seconds of torture I left with no intentions of ever speaking to him again.