The People I Slept With.

I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO BUT MOSTLY THANK THE GUYS MY FRIENDS AND I HAVE BEEN INVOLVED WITH BECAUSE ALL OF THE FOLLOWING STORIES ARE TRU

Tag: naked

SHE COULDN’T HAVE WAITED?

by ThePeopleISleptWith

Like most 17 year olds I had to find sneaky ways to have sex with my boyfriend in my parents house. Luckily we had a basement. It was the perfect place to have sex since you could hear the door open, leaving just enough time to get dressed… that was until one day. We were going at it, completely naked, with the TV blasting and didn’t hear my mom coming downstairs. One second everything was fine then out of nowhere there my mom was standing in the doorway, with a perfect view of my boyfriend’s ass. She screamed, “OH MY GOD!”  ran upstairs and slammed the door. Still inside me, he looked into my eyes and said, “What the fuck, she couldn’t have waited until I came?”

THREE PUMPS

by ThePeopleISleptWith

After six months of heavy drinking, good friends and great weed I got over my ex. Of course that’s when he decided to text me. It didn’t help that I was just drunk enough to think that answering him was a good idea. After a few more beers I would of been too busy singing “Man I Feel Like A Women” to reply. I shouldn’t of been surprised when the friendly conversation quickly turned sexual. Later that night he picked me up and drove to our “spot” …that use to be romantic.  We quickly moved to the back seat and he ripped off my clothes. I guess he thought that texting was enough foreplay because he just stuck it right in. One pump, two pumps, three pumps and he was done.

VOMIT, SWEAT AND TEARS

by ThePeopleISleptWith

He was the last person I expected to show up to my friends party. I told myself I wouldn’t even give him the time of the day.. but I should of known I’d give him more than that. I hoped to at least make him beg for it, but it only took 6 seconds of eye contact before I let him kiss me.. Thank you Tequila. Not long after we went out to his car to “talk.” As he ripped my clothes are off I couldn’t help but worry that being completely naked wasn’t the best idea. I could see my friends in the distance smoking on the porch. A few minutes later our clothes were fully off and the windows were all fogged up BUT nothing was happening. I was personally offended that he couldn’t get hard until he started to vomit. He quickly opened the car door, the interior light turned on and he threw up. I searched for my clothes in order to avoid further embarrassment, but they were under his feet. I wanted to help him but not as much as I didn’t want my friends too see my boobs, so I pushed him aside and got dressed. There was no time for underwear so I stuck my panties in my pocket. Now there is nothing attractive about a penis to begin with, especially a flaccid penis.. but add vomit, sweat and teary eyes..not the best sight. Fifteen frustrating minutes later we returned to the party, I’ll never forget the disgusted look of disapproval on my friend’s faces.

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STOP INTERRUPTING

by ThePeopleISleptWith

Unfortunately there are limited comfortable ways to have sex in a small car. You can sit on top of him, if you want to hit your head on the ceiling. You can do it missionary, if you want to slam your head on the side door… The obvious fog, leather seats and risk of getting caught doesn’t exactly help.

I try to avoid car sex but there are limited options when your drunk and stranded. The seat belt was making an indent on my lower back and I felt a bump forming on my head. I had to say , “Let’s switch positions.” “Stop interrupting,” he said. I didn’t think I was interrupting.. I thought I was communicating. Eventually we were actually interrupted by my friend beeping his car horn next to us. I sat up quickly, exposing my chest to five male teenagers standing next to my car. The bump on my head was no longer the problem.

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A POLITE LIE

by ThePeopleISleptWith

When I opened my eyes his hand was firmly cupping my left boob.. under the shirt, over the bra. I turned onto my stomach freeing my breast. I couldn’t hold my pee any longer so I turned around and sat up…. There he was laying on his side, leaning on his arm starring at me. Our eyes met and he smiled. I attempted to smile back but I doubt it was convincing. I told him I needed to pee and go home. He sighed and said ” But you said you were off tomorrow. ” and damn it, I did say that. I told him I still had things to do and just needed to go home. He continued to question every aspect of my story. Truth is my story was bullshit… Obviously bullshit. Yeah, I am lying and you know… Let’s avoid the awkward banter and just let me go. Do you really want me to say the truth… “you’re creeping me out, why are you laying like that? Your apartment is too hot, your bed in uncomfortable, it smells funny in here and you are cuddle groping me.” I’m just trying to be polite. When I walked out he told me he would call me later… another polite lie.

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