The People I Slept With.

I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO BUT MOSTLY THANK THE GUYS MY FRIENDS AND I HAVE BEEN INVOLVED WITH BECAUSE ALL OF THE FOLLOWING STORIES ARE TRU

Category: FRIEND SEX

“IT DOESN’T FIT”

by ThePeopleISleptWith

I kneeled on all fours as he “made love” to me like an animal. This would have been fine if he wasn’t humping me as fast a dog would hump a leg. Although hard and fast sex could be exciting and enjoyable this was not one of those times – parked behind abandoned store in the middle of the day..  it could not have been less sexy. As we drove away he looked at me and said, “It doesn’t fit.” I had no idea what he was talking about. “When I fuck you from behind it doesn’t fit, I can tell, you were fidgeting,” he said proud of his apparently HUGE penis. I explained to him that it was fine, it just didn’t feel good that fast at that moment. Of course he refused to believe me and went on to brag to his friends about how his penis would not fit inside me from behind. The problem was not the size of the wave at all… just the rapid jack-hammering motion of the ocean.

the sweetest thing

8 REASONS I SHOULDN’T OF SLEPT WITH HIM

by ThePeopleISleptWith

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1) He tipped in change, 50 cents to be exact.

2) He told me he already ate when I said I was hungry.

3) He sarcastically suggested a threesome 4 times. Joking or not, one time was more than enough.

4) When the bartender handed me the wrong drink he said, ” She’ll just drink that.” Oh, okay.

5) The nicest thing he said about me was that I had a nice butt.

6) He ordered the exact amount of beers that I said would get me drunk.

7) He clearly does not know the difference between confident man and conceited asshole.

8) He asked me if I came. If you have to ask the answer is no.

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GAME OVER

by ThePeopleISleptWith

I went down on him while he sat in the front seat of his car. I could hear the voices of our friends playing beer-pong and the music from the party we ditched. The voices grew closer as his moans grew more intense.  Don’t gag, don’t gag… I prayed as I gave it my all. I must have been too distracted by his ball sweat.. wondering if he even showered that day to notice our friends were approaching the car. Without warning he pushed my head down, all the way, holding me there so they couldn’t could see. GAME OVER, I lifted my head up and jumped back. I put my clothes on, silently, avoiding eye contact as I waited for my friends to continue walking down the street. I left the car, glancing back at him giving him to chance to apologize then slammed the door.

fail

STOP INTERRUPTING

by ThePeopleISleptWith

Unfortunately there are limited comfortable ways to have sex in a small car. You can sit on top of him, if you want to hit your head on the ceiling. You can do it missionary, if you want to slam your head on the side door… The obvious fog, leather seats and risk of getting caught doesn’t exactly help.

I try to avoid car sex but there are limited options when your drunk and stranded. The seat belt was making an indent on my lower back and I felt a bump forming on my head. I had to say , “Let’s switch positions.” “Stop interrupting,” he said. I didn’t think I was interrupting.. I thought I was communicating. Eventually we were actually interrupted by my friend beeping his car horn next to us. I sat up quickly, exposing my chest to five male teenagers standing next to my car. The bump on my head was no longer the problem.

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AMERICAN PSYCHO

by ThePeopleISleptWith

One Friday night my F-buddy “offered me a ride home.” We went to my place since I could easily sneak him into my room. I was particularly excited that night because it’d been a while since the last time we hooked up and my period had JUST ended. After he left, I turned the light on to change into my PJ’s and I noticed that the condom he’d worn was on the floor next to my bed… it was red. My first thought was that it was a flavored condom, but when I grabbed a tissue to pick it up, I realized it was blood. My blood. FROM MY VAGINA. I pulled the comforter off my bed and was immediately mortified. It looked like someone had been murdered.. like a scene from American Psycho. Apparently, Aunt Flo wasn’t gone like I thought she was. That was when I realized that he kept his shirt on while we had sex. I went into a panic. What if I’d gotten blood on his shirt? WHAT IF I GOT BLOOD ON HIM?!?!?!

Image– Anonymous

SUBMIT YOUR STORY HERE

THE MORNING AFTER SEXTING

by ThePeopleISleptWith

After a night of sexting I decided to re-read the conversation. ” CANTT WAIT TO RIP OFF ALL UR CLOTHES,” was the last text. I scrolled up for a while covering my mouth with shock every few seconds. Okay… we defiantly meant the things we said but there is just something wrong with… ” I WANA B INSIDE U MAD BAD.” Type out BE.. it’s so simple, it’s just one extra letter, half a second out of your life. If you do want to be inside me MAD bad check your grammar. I’m not your bro.. we are talking about sex. ” I WANNA FCK U” Oh really!? You want to FCK me. We are sexting I don’t need you to be Romeo.. just text like the literate grown up you are.

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