ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SWITCH
by ThePeopleISleptWith
It was our third date and I couldn’t wait any longer. I sat on his bed as he plugged in his iPod and and put on Reggae music. He locked eyes with me and walked over slowly as if Reggae music was some kind of ” sexy” music that set the mood. Although the music weirded me out the second he took off his shirt I no longer cared. Just as things heated up he grabbed his ” sex pillow” a pillow designed to have sex on…. I’m always down to try new things but a sex pillow.. the first time.. Ehh I don’t know. The sex was weird, he kept switching positions. I felt like a rag doll being tossed around. It took a minute or so for me to notice that he was humping me exactly six times in every position. I have no idea where he learned that technique .. BUT NEVER DO IT. I looked up at him to say something when I noticed him counting… one, two, three, four, five, six, switch, one, two, three, four, five. six, switch.. to the beat of the music. After three more counts and my personal best fake orgasm he came. We never spoke again.
Love this one, very funny x
Still laughing. Thank you for the post.
Reblogged this on Vancouverandy and commented:
What Not to do!
Seriously just made my morning. I can’t laugh any harder.
Oh crap… If this doesn’t work I’m going to have to completely switch up my technique 😉
obsessive compulsive sex maybe? hahahahaha
loved this – made me chuckle
[note to self – keep mouth closed when counting] 😆
Men are idiots
I concur…hahaha. Um…are you a man? Lol
HAHA no!!!!
Lol alright.
I am not only a man, but a manly man!
Oh my lord, this really made me laugh out loud, thanks for making my evening 😉
Don’t you just love girls? The ability to act like you’re enjoying it, while thinking ‘what the hell is he doing?’